The three ways to add someone on Discord

You can add someone to Discord in three ways: by their username and tag number, by a direct link they send you, or by searching for them if you share a server. The method you use depends on whether you already know their exact Discord name and whether they've made themselves straightforward to find.

Discord usernames are not unique — two people can have the same name. That's why Discord assigns each account a four-digit number (called a tag or discriminator) that appears after a hashtag. When someone gives you their Discord contact information, they'll usually write it as username#1234. You need both parts to add them by name.

If you don't have their exact username and tag, the other routes — using a link or finding them in a shared server — are faster and more reliable than guessing.

Key Takeaways

  • Adding someone by username requires their exact name and four-digit tag number, which you can find in their Discord profile or ask them directly.
  • A Discord invite link is the easiest method if someone sends you one — you click it, and they appear in your friends list once they accept your request.
  • If you're already in the same server, you can right-click their name in the member list and select "Add Friend" without needing their username.
  • Once you send a friend request, the other person must accept it before you can message them — they'll see a notification asking them to confirm.

Adding someone by username and tag

Open Discord and click the plus icon next to "Friends" in the left sidebar. A box will appear asking you to enter a username. Type the person's username and tag exactly as they gave it to you — for example, Luna#4892. Discord is case-sensitive for the username part, so luna#4892 and Luna#4892 are different.

Click "Send Friend Request" and wait. The person will see a notification that you've sent them a request. They can accept, decline, or ignore it. You won't be able to message them until they accept, and they won't see your message requests unless they've turned on that setting in their privacy options.

If you get an error saying the user doesn't exist, ask the person to confirm their username and tag again. A common mistake is mixing up the number — Discord tags look random and are straightforward to mistype.

Using a Discord invite link

If someone sends you a link that starts with discord.gg/ or discord.com/users/, that's a Discord invite. The easiest way to add them is to ask them to send you a direct user invite link instead of a server invite. A user invite link looks like discord.com/users/123456789 and takes you straight to their profile.

Click the link, and you'll see their profile page. Click "Add Friend" and send the request. This method skips the username-and-tag step entirely and works even if you don't know their exact name.

If someone sends you a server invite instead (a link to join a Discord community), you can still add them once you're both in that server — see the next section.

Adding someone from a shared server

If you and another person are already members of the same Discord server, you can add them without knowing their username. Open the server, click the server name at the top, and select "Members" to see the full member list. Find the person's name, right-click it, and select "Add Friend." Send the request and wait for them to accept.

This method is useful when you meet someone in a public server or community and want to stay in touch. It also works if you're not sure you have their username spelled correctly.

What happens after you send a request

Once you send a friend request, Discord sends the other person a notification. They can accept it, decline it, or leave it pending. Until they accept, you can't send them direct messages — any messages you try to send will go to their message requests folder instead, and they may not see them depending on their privacy settings.

If someone declines your request, you can send another one later, but Discord doesn't notify them again. If you want to reach them and they've declined, your best option is to message them in a server you both belong to and ask why, or ask a mutual friend to help.

If a request sits pending for a long time, Discord doesn't delete it automatically. You can cancel it yourself by clicking your Friends list, finding their name under "Pending," and clicking the X.

Privacy settings that affect adding friends

Discord has a setting that controls who can add you as a friend. If someone's setting is locked down, you might not be able to send them a request at all — you'll get an error instead. The person can change this in their User Settings under "Privacy & Safety" by adjusting who can send them friend requests (Friends, Server Members, or Nobody).

If you can't add someone and you're not in a server together, ask them to check their privacy settings or to send you a direct user invite link instead. That bypasses the restriction.

Frequently Asked Questions

What's the difference between a friend request and a message request?

A friend request asks someone to add you to their friends list. A message request is a direct message from someone who isn't on your friends list yet. If their privacy settings allow it, you'll see message requests in a separate folder. They can read it without accepting your friend request, but you won't know if they've seen it.

Can I add someone if I only know their username without the tag number?

No — you need both the username and the four-digit tag to add someone by name. If you don't have the tag, ask them for it, use a direct invite link, or find them in a server you both belong to and add them from the member list.

Why does Discord say the user doesn't exist when I try to add them?

The most common reason is a typo in the username or tag number. Discord usernames are case-sensitive, and the tag is straightforward to misread. Ask the person to confirm their exact username and tag, or ask them to send you a direct user invite link instead.

What if someone blocks me on Discord?

If someone blocks you, you won't be able to send them friend requests or messages. You also won't see their online status or be able to join voice channels they're in. If you think you've been blocked, you can ask a mutual friend, or try adding them again later — if it still fails, they've likely blocked you.